Thursday, November 16, 2017

2 Kinds Of People 2 Consider Giving “Limericks of Doom II” 2 This Holiday Season

Those you like, send word via Ben
Of our years left—perhaps only ten!
And those whom you don’t,
Send this and you won’t
Hear from them ever again.

https://www.amazon.com/Limericks-Doom-II-Benjamin-Donkey/dp/1974552012/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1507829426&sr=8-1&keywords=Limericks+of+Doom+II

Friday, September 22, 2017

On What’s Been Happening Lately

Wouldn’t it be weird as shit
If we finally had to admit
That we didn’t go cuckoo
From mishaps like Fuku,
But this time it really is it?

Friday, July 7, 2017

Medicine

I felt listless and down—didn’t know
Just what was the problem, although
The cause was uncloaked
The next time I smoked:
My cannabis level was low!

Thursday, June 22, 2017

Too Alienated from Nature?

The conclusion that some people draw  
Is we’ve drifted from natural law;
But doom cognoscenti
See nature aplenty,
Red in both tooth and in claw.

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Those Who Don’t Learn History

Those who don’t study about
How Nazis develop their clout
Are now doomed to repeat—
With a front row seat—
What they didn’t already find out.

Saturday, June 3, 2017

Fuckity Fuck

Fuckity fuckity fuck— 
Fuckity fuckity fuck;
Fuckity fuck,
Fuckity fuck:
Fuckity fuckity fuck!

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Sgt. Pepper

It was fifty years ago today
Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play;
And though I am biased,
I think that’s the highest
We got till we all went away.

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Maladapted

We evolved for small tribes, which seemed good
Until overshoot changed our hood;
Since then we’ve resorted
To make-dos contorted,
And managed the best that we could.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Reefer Madness

We’re totally fucked, as you see,  
And there’s no way that we can break free;
I’m not someone who plugs     
That the answer is drugs, 
But they seem to be working for me.

Sunday, May 14, 2017

Jester

Laugh when folks claim doom’s a hoax,
Seek distraction from favorite strokes,
Try to pretend
That this isn’t the end—
At some point, you run out of jokes.

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

On Increasing Awareness That WASF

I’m more and more certain of late
That we haven’t much longer to wait:
I believe more and more
We can’t change what’s in store,
And ever more strongly in fate.

Monday, April 24, 2017

Done

“Make the most of each day,” it is said,
“With the time left before we’re all dead!”
Well, I’ve had it—the stuff
That I’ve done is enough:
I say “Fuck it!” and go back to bed.

Saturday, April 22, 2017

Bargaining via “If”

If I could grow wings, I would fly,
But I can’t—that’s why I don’t try;
If there wouldn’t be doom,
We’d be fine, I assume,
But there is, and we’re all going to die.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Acceptance: It’s Simple!

Here’s a truth which you can’t disavow:
In the end, life is no cat’s meow;
It’s getting quite late
For accepting your fate—
Let me know if you figure out how.

Monday, March 6, 2017

Lent

A doomer was asked if he knew
What, for Lent, he was going to do;
He said that he’d give
Up the will to live
(It’s funny because it’s true).

Saturday, March 4, 2017

The Stupid

The pre-Renaissance returns
And logical thinking adjourns;      
The strength of the brute  
Rules every dispute:
The stupid! It burns! It burns!

Thursday, March 2, 2017

Misapprehension

Oh the weather outside is storming
And habitats keep transforming;
And since, as we know,
We’ve no place to go,
Good thing there’s no global warming.

Saturday, February 25, 2017

Back to the Thirties

If not learning the past’s what you do,
You’ll repeat what folks had to go through;
But with history’s view,
It’s regrettably true:
You’re still doomed to repeat it now too.

Monday, February 20, 2017

1984

Some folks smoke dope or get juiced
Because we will soon have vamoosed;
But I’m glad as hell
That the war’s going well,
And chocolate rations won’t be reduced.

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

A Brief Introduction to AGW

The trouble with increasing heat
Is it’s making us all obsolete;
Our food, plants and meat,
Won’t grow—they’ll deplete,
And we’ll die when there’s nothing to eat.

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Captain’s Log, Ecclesiastes 1:2

Here lies the species humanity:
Did they die from some kind of insanity?
All their ability
Yielded futility—
Vanity, all is just vanity.

Friday, February 3, 2017

Everyone’s Cranky Lately

Taking sides and more quick to condemn,
Feeling grouchy and starting mayhem:
As “others” bring forces
To take “our” resources,
More and more of “us” turn into “them.”

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Slogans

Worried about how we’ll cope,
We still thought we’d make it—but nope:
Paradoxically strange,
We had hope without change,
And now we have change without hope.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Don’t Be Depressed!

Don’t be depressed and in doubt:
Keep your head held up high and don’t pout;
Soldier on! Do it now!
I’ll let you know how—
Just as soon as I figure it out.

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Strange Days

We’re surprised every time we detect
Something new in our lives getting wrecked;
We’re dismayed, bit by bit, 
As our world turns to shit—
But what else then did we expect?

Sunday, January 15, 2017

Thought for the Day

Here are my thoughts for a penny:
The reasons to give up are many;
And if you should find
These thoughts in your mind,
Now is as good a time as any.

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Politics Anymore

The world’s in the midst of rebranding,
Including re who is commanding:
The changes in clime
Bring a new paradigm—
The one that’s called “last person standing.”

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

EROEI #2

How much we still try might be tested
With an acronym doomers suggested;
It’s thusly discerned:
"Enjoyment Returned
On Energy Invested."

Sunday, January 8, 2017

WASF

We used to complain that things sucked—
Then came doom, which we cannot obstruct;
Words can’t really express
Just how bad is this mess,
And so we say, “We are so fucked!”

Friday, January 6, 2017

Fuck Me

Fuck me, and the hope I contrive,
Fuck me running for being alive;
Fuck me hard, fuck me dead,
Fuck me sideways, I said,
Fuck my life, and all of that jive.

Monday, January 2, 2017

There’s Still Hope

You don’t need a research committee
To know that the future’s not pretty;
But still there is hope
That, with liquor and dope,
Things will seem somewhat less shitty.

Happy  New Year everybody!